First published at FHM Philippines, May 22, 2009 | 05:27PM
Last week I asked this question: Which is more difficult to manage: a career or a relationship? In my case, managing a career is harder – by a mile, in fact.
Let me begin by talking about my work history. During the early part of my career, I worked for a couple of large corporations. My stints with both companies were not long. I have always had difficulty being an employee and reporting to bosses primarily because I do not like to play company politics, kiss asses, window dress and follow orders from superiors who I think are incompetent. After a few years in the corporate set-up, I decided that enough was enough. So I started my own company.
Right now, I am not completely exempted from playing company politics, kissing asses and window dressing. I still have to tolerate clients like Mr. Toxic and staff like Ms. Absent-Minded. I am a very straightforward person. I always speak my mind. Although repressing anger and emotions in my current set-up is not as brutal as being employed, biting my tongue and holding back still takes a lot out of me. I guess the only benefit of running my own company is not dealing with bosses.
To me, it always seemed that when it comes to work and career, there is nothing worth hanging on to. If things don’t work well for me, I can just check out, call it quits and try out other endeavors.
Although my relationship with my partner has caused its fair share of snags, I never even considered checking out and calling it quits. I think a lot had to do with the fact that I had less work experience compared to the number of relationships I was involved in. Don’t get me wrong, I have had only two serious relationships. Most of the relationships I refer to here are my dealings with people I have encountered in my life (like relatives, family, friends, etc.). Hence, with all that practice, I understood what energies are needed to make a relationship last. And when I started going out with my current partner, I knew he was the person whom I could make it work and with whom I wanted to make it work.
This does not mean that keeping a relationship is a drive on easy street. Although there are always unexplored paths and uncharted territories, maintaining a union has always come naturally to me. Right now, years into our relationship, my feeling of security and comfort has grown and is still growing. I feel that our relationship is like a rock that stabilizes me when I’m being jarred by everything else around me. To me, that is something worth hanging on to.